CC Duren

these past few weeks i have been learning that life really throws you curve balls, they are strange, surprising, and sometimes they hurt, but in the end you know that you learn something from them, and are more prepared for the next time around!  most of you that have been reading my blog know that a lot of things in my life have completly changed.  i moved across the country, got my own apartment, changed my major, go to a huge new school, got a new job (which i love), and have had some crazy boy dramas (are there any other kind).  My family has also been hitting some curve balls, my dog Bear, who is probably more pampered by my parents then i am is sick, he has been in the hospital for three days now, and things just aren’t looking good.  my mom has been sick, and even went to the emergency room the other day (those who know my mom, know that she is not the hospital type).  my grandma was in the hospital this past week because she is so sick, and as i have mentioned in the past i am also battling being ill.  i recently made my first doctors appointment with a GI specialist, its kinda scary, i know that there is something wrong with me, but i don’t know what it is… once again.  my life has also had many personal changes, i have meet some pretty great people, mostly those who i work with, or coach, but all around top notch people.  i have my life line maddie, who i have known since high school, but never really appreciated until now, i couldn’t do it without her.  also in my life has been one man inparticular.  This man was one of my best friends, i couldn’t be around him without laughing until i peed, then we took our relationship to the “next step”, but things just didn’t work out, he was still “in love” with his ex, and i was still caught up on someone else.  days after we ended things i decided that i still had feelings for him, and that friendship was going to be harder than i thought.  this wouldn’t be to bad, except for the fact that i work with him, and see him almost everyday.  as the days past our friendship becomes more and  more complicated, and harder for me to bare, its not that i want to lose him as a friend, but it just hurts to much!    there have also been some very questionable choices that i have had to make lately, some that i am choosing to keep to myself, but there is one choice that just keeps on haunting me.  last week i went to the doctors, where i found out that there is something wrong with my intesten, and that i am WAY to stressed out for my age, or for any age. last year my doctor suggested that i take a semester off of school to get my health back on track, but i decided that i knew best, and that school was where i wanted to be.  well when returning to the doc this time, i was not suggested anything i was told that a semester off was what i needed.  this was great, i really have been wanting it, but knew that my parents would never go for it.  its not that i want the semester off to travel, and spend money, i really just want to work, and get my health back on track.  the only problem is i really feel like my parents would be disappointed, or think that i am just being lazy, i also don’t want to disappoint myself, or take the time off for the wrong reasons, i mean maybe i am being lazy, alot of people go to school, work, and deal with medical issues.  i don’t know!